Tuesday, December 7

here comes....a creepy guy?

A couple of weeks ago a flier came home from my son's school announcing breakfast with Santa.  I was all Wow this is awesome!  Ethan will be so excited.  I will be the coolest mom ever!  Who cares if it's at nine on a Saturday morning?  Not me, I'm a super bad ass mom.  I'm totally going to get a shirt with that printed on it.  

Sometimes I get carried away when I'm thinking to myself.  

I sent the money in and waited until a couple of days before the breakfast to tell Ethan about my super awesomeness.  His response was total bullshit. 

Uhhh...Isn't Santa fake?  I thought he was only on TV.

Total bullshit right?  He just turned six!

My uncle believed in Santa until he was like twelve.

Lying to your kids about Santa makes up for all the crap they put you through during the other eleven months of the year.  

On Saturday I was nervous about taking him to have breakfast with a random stranger dressed in a red suit.  I didn't want him to break it to the other kids and get us chased out of the school with pitchforks.    I had to threaten him.  It was my only option.  

When we got to the school I made sure we sat at a table by ourselves.  When the creepy guy with a pillow shoved in his red suit walked in I was proven correct in my decision to isolate us.

Mommy, I think that is a guy just dressed like Santa.  Why did he do that?


Luckily he didn't ruin the Santa fantasy for any kids or parents.

I'm also screwed out of playing the Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy.*

I wish he would use his genius for good instead of being a dream killer.

*I'm sort of relieved about the tooth fairy thing, because I was not looking forward to climbing into his bunk bed and rummaging around for a tooth.

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